The Cracks in the Barrell.....

The first crack appeared when I couldn't whore it up on Facebook no mores. Its filtered out at work (because I work with 5 bazillion teenage boys who cant be responsible itermenet users) and I still haven't got teh webz at the new house.

The second one appeared when my complete and total lack of ability to make decisions about my life (see above mentioned lack of readily available porn for evidence) extended to my pittiful excuse for a love life. Of course he came back. He loves me. Or rather loves what I do for him. Whatevers. I'm so over the saga that is Inadequate Boyfriend and me. Its like The Young & The Restless, only he and I aren't so pretty (or well paid, I imagine). It's very, VERY draining. In many ways. But mostly I'm just over it (the drama, not him unfortunately). Really, all I want is for it to be resolved one way or the other. Actually, that's not true. I just want him to love me in the way I deserve to be loved. Bah, enough of that shite. Its BORING.

Another crack has been my new job. Which I'm too afraid to talk about because a large part of it is in the IT industry. In brief, I work for somebody who has ALOT of different business interests, in ALOT of different industries. In a broad sense, for the layman, I guess you would consider my job a sort of "Group CFO" thing. I basically run the accounting for all the different companies. My original "contract" was rather flexible and vague. It's now been the obligatory 3 months which every person knows is your "prove it or lose it" period. I've not yet been granted a performance review, and whilst I'm quietly confident of my performance to date (with 1 or 2 areas for improvement, and alot still to be tested - it takes time, my job needs a thorough understanding of the companies and their industries which NOONE can get in 3 months) I haven't been given an appointed time for the review yet, and it unnerves me a little. There have been a couple of other things that have concerned me, or bothered me, and well, I'm not the kind of person who likes loose ends and uncertainty.

On the plus side, I have made a fantastic new friend. She makes me very happy. And that's all I'm saying there for now. Its new and shiny and I'm holding it tightly to my chest, hugging and squeezing it, enjoying the happy glow I feel from having it all to myself for a while.

Inadequate Boyfriend promised, well not promised as in actually saying the word PROMISE, but he did say he would..... anyway, IB said I would get something I've wanted from him our whole relationship before he jets off overseas in a couple of weeks. Not sure I believe it, but I can't help hoping.

And the new house is lovely and big and usable and nice and in a great location and has a wonderful neighbourhood and is so good for us...... well.... its just GRAND really. And makes a huge difference to our travel times, and just our quality of life in general really. Sigh.

Must be off....... have ISP's to cajole into being nice to me so I can cruise inappropriate websites again. Oh ok, and see what new porn there is!

Later peeps!