I'm a Self Absorbed Bitch... & I Don't Care

Well, I do care. But not that much.

Victoria is, well, fucked up the arse. Not only by something sharp and pointed, but the prick is barbed and hurts going in AND out. Looters huh? No big surprise there, yet still just as disgusting. So the sproglet and I have both made donations, and there's other stuff in the works, but

a) charity isn't charity when you brag for the kudos

b) Im a total whore and this blog is all about meeeeeeeeee.

So onto the "real" news. Yep, the bits about moi.

How is it that you can be so surrounded by people, yet so alone at the same time? Honestly, I cant get 2 seconds to scratch my ass in private (no that doesnt mean im doing it in public, or at all) yet whenever I seem to need some human contact, theres no-one around.

I'm having an absolute cunt of a time lately. Truth be told I have been for a few months. And the shit just keeps on coming. So when I got some good news yesterday (not that good really, but not totally arse-sucking-ly terrible so I'm calling it good) I wanted to share my momentary suspension of feeling like shite 24/7. But do you think I could find anyone? Nup. NADA. ZILCH.

Fuck me but is it that hard for the universe to fucking back of for 5 minutes? I know people have it worse blah blah blah but that really doesn't make my shit any less craptacular, it just makes me feel GUILTY on top of feeling crap.

I need a fucking job. Yes I know im still technically employed, yada yada, but fuck you all, that shit don't count. I'm sick of being told I'm too fucking good for your job. I dont want to be lil miss fantastic anymore, ok? I want a JOB for a bit, not a CAREER. My life is a steaming pile of dog shit right now. Im an utter failure. I need some time to focus on fixing all the stuff ive fucked up by being lil miss fantastic. So see? I'm not really so damn awesome after all am I? SO GIVE ME THE FUCKING JOB ALREADY!!! And your shithouse job located 6 billion km's from my house? Dont try making out to me that I should be grateful and excited at being offered $50K for doing it, ok? Just DON'T. Because its all I can do not to walk out then and there. A year ago you wouldn't have been able to afford a trained monkey to do that job for $50K.

Stupid economic crisis making companies sack all their staff meaning there are over 100 resumes submitted for every fucking job. One position I am up for I have had 3 interviews already with at least 1, probably 2 more before the position will be offered. WTF? Barak Obama didnt have this many interviews for fucks sake. Who do you think you are? You are most DEFINATELY not whoever it is you are thinking. Your not BRW listed. Not blue chip. Idiots. And why are companies interviewing shortlists of over 15 candidates? That's not a short list. That's and excuse not to do any REAL work. FUCK OFF.

Also, what the fuck am I doing wrong money wise? Seriously? I know there are all these single mum's out there who are doing way shitter jobs than me and are surviving. So why can I not afford $50Kpa?

The sproglet has of course a new teacher. Who gives more than an hour homework each night. For year THREE people. And it has to be handed in each morning. 3 failures to hand it in, means a detention. Doing 2 nights work in 1 night counts as a failure. WTF? So what happens when Mummy is simply too damn fucked to bother fighting her kid into doing his homework, and then sitting there helping with it? Because an hour's work equates to a 3 hour struggle in our house (and yours too im sure). You work 9 - 3 for 56K minimum, why the fuck do I work harder than you and have to come home to that? And when I am too damn fucked, why does my kid get punished? Fuck me. Its ridiculous! And why did my son's homework come home on the first day with a note to ME saying: "Where are Sproglet's personal corrections? These MUST be done." Get fucked you crusty old bitch. This isnt MY homework. Yelling at people might be fun for you at school, but if you think you can tell ME off you are in for a MIGHT-TEE big surprise, let me assure you. And trust me, its not the "good" sort of surprise.

Oh, truckies can fuck right off too. Particularly the one who nearly smooshed my son and I into marmalade on Monday night. Changing into our lane with no indicator in your B-Double and sandwiching us between you and the median is NOT ok, mkay? Oh and FYI - raising your hand out the window does NOT make the fact that you tested out my ABS brakes to the max all ok. A pussy arsed WAVE does not stop me from having my chest explode from a pounding heart, it does not stop the dire need to vomit, and it sure as shit does not un-freeze my son from gripping my left arm in fear. It did have the bonus of having him shut the fuck up in silence for a good 2 minutes, however as I was too freaked to enjoy it, you dont get the kudos for that either. Asswipe.

And to top it all off, Sproglet's pet rabbit bit me this morning for having the gall to clean his hutch out. How fucking dare I try and make the creature comfortable and not sit in his own piss and shit all day?

Cunt.